06 May How to Address an Issue without Causing Defensiveness
Here is the formula:
1. Understand that their intention is positive. Through the study of human behaviour, we’ve come to understand that all behaviour is from a positive intention space. For example, it may simply be their positive intention to protect their own identity or self-worth that has caused them to do something negative.
2. Separate behaviour from intention. The more you separate behaviour from intention, the less defensive an individual will be.
3. Here is a script for addressing it:
“Hi Jack, the other day in our meeting, you mentioned something to Jenny and I’m wondering if you can help me understand where you’re coming from. I know that your intention was good, and I need your help to understand what message you were delivering?”
Use this script to address an issue with a staff member. It will enable you to address their behaviour, rather than their intention, enabling behaviourial change.
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